Choked Air
Choked Air
Kyle Pederson (2021)
Voicing: SATB
Accompaniment: Piano
Text: Kyle Pederson and Roosevelt High School Concert Choir, Sioux Falls, SD
Commissioned by Robyn Starks Holcomb and the Roosevelt High School Concert Choir
Chaos 1:
choked air, fires everywhere
can’t breathe in, does anybody even care? broken glass, sirens blast
sinking soul, shrinking fast
spinning mind, I sit and stare
been weary and worried and scared
facts--buried somewhere
cracks--in reality shared;
do we despair if we can’t tell the truth from a lie?
waves are coming, emotions flooding drowning in conflict, running on empty inside
Chaos II:
choked air, fires everywhere
can’t breathe in, does anybody even care? meltdown--of civility
shut down--the economy
stressed out, can’t deal, breakdown is coming for me.
So low, spread out, back up, when will it end? I don’t know.
heartbreak--for those mistreated
eyes awake--to the cries unheeded
but I ache for heroes putting their life on the line
torn--in different directions
mourn--for the stain of oppression
look in the mirror, what’s at the core? What do I stand for? so many questions.
The Climb:
Climbing on the rubble, we stumble ahead
As the ground crumbles again and again
Not giving up and not giving in
through the tears we have shed and the hope we have bled
Hope:
There is a light,
Her presence blesses all who lift their eye
She beckons all to the miracles barely visible unless you look...
to the smile behind the mask
open hands behind the glass
to the chance to slow down
to know how to live inside this moment
to notice hearts are open, ready to heal what’s broken
There’s laughing, friends dancing, hope advancing, people reconciling, beauty calling, grace falling, love evolving, people rising
Chaos III:
choked air, fires everywhere
can’t breathe in, does anybody even care? bottles up, pills down
family fighting all around
gurneys rolling, who’s consoling?
it’s taking a toll on me.
Personal Note:
In the fall of 2020, Roosevelt High School choir director, Robyn Starks Holcomb commissioned senior choir member, Shelby Wright, to create a visual art piece representing the Concert Choir’s collective experience of the prior several months--a time period marked by pandemic, racial tension, political polarization and violence. Shelby asked the choir members a variety of questions, and their responses guided her approach to her painting. The choir then commissioned me to craft a choral work, inspired by both the student responses and Shelby’s painting.
Shelby’s painting is stunning—and you will quickly see how it captures a range of student emotion and reaction to their experience of 2020.
As I crafted the choral piece, I wanted to honor the diversity of perspective I found in the painting and read in the student responses. One consistent theme that emerged from the students, however, is that there were silver linings. Despite the chaos and the frustration and the heartbreak—there was still love, and hope, and light. In one breath students could write grippingly about struggles with depression, substance abuse, financial difficulty, and anger—and in the next breath they could tell beautiful stories of friendship, overcoming odds, gritty determination, and their foundational belief that things would get better.
The choral work seeks to capture all of this mess—with a bent towards hope and light that I, too, share with the students.
About the video:
The music video is the final product in this collaborative process between choir, director, artist, videographers, and composer. The choir went out to three different locations that seek to convey the variety of reactions and themes explored in the piece.
If you perform this work:
You are encouraged to make this piece your own. Phrases throughout can be adapted to your own circumstances, and the aleatoric section can truly become whatever you want it to be. You are welcome to change additional lyrics in the piece so that it really becomes representative of what your choir wants/needs to communicate. Industrial hits/noises can be added for effect throughout; and narration can be created at the beginning to help the audience/listener understand what is about to unfold.